5 yoga rules for my dog

My 50something body, my 16-miles- a- week running routine, and my sanity necessitate a daily ritual of meditation, immediately followed by 15 minutes of yoga stretches and poses. My wonderful dog Mae, always eager to participate in everything , is even more excited about the fact that I am purposely coming down to the floor- typically her domain, since she often eats off it. I don’t think I am anthropomorphizing if I interpret Mae’s enthusiasm as genuine joy for the opportunity to be with me and I do not take her adoration lightly. I feel gratitude everyday for the life-enhancing relationship I enjoy with Mae, but her exuberance over my coming down to her level creates some interference in my practice so I’ve instituted some etiquette /hygiene guidelines for her:

1. There’s no chewing in yoga!
-Blocks, stretchy bands, rolled up rugs- yes.
Chew bones- No!

mae chewing in yoga

2. Yoga is not a competition.
I know your downward dog is better than mine! Don’t show off- Bitch!

mae downward dog

3. Do not sniff the burning flame of the candle.
– That is gonna leave a mark!

4. Meditation is not:
a. Jumping on my on my bed to sleep with your head on the pillow
Or
b. licking your nether-parts

mae lickin

and lastly

5. Do not lick my face when I am in corpse pose/ Asana
(See 4b above)

Admittedly, I am not a yoga teacher or even a spiritual advisor, but it would appear to me that less licking and more breathing might advance Mae’s practice.   Abiding by some of the philosophy of yoga, I try to maintain an attitude of acceptance and tolerance for her “doggishness” ,  but we still gotta have some ground rules.  I will welcome Mae to join me each morning and hope that she can honor my humanness .  Namaste.

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3 Responses

  1. Mae’s downward Dog has a fairly good start – let’s see her after a few more sessions, good on her puppy pose, but I suspect she’s making up her own pose at the end – well she is quite good on getting to the end………….Toby

  2. Mae Mae has the downward dog down to a tee. She does need to work on her meditation. The more I know about Mae Mae, the more I like her. Sarah

  3. When I do my archangel meditation, Gladys goes to the mat and wants a good belly rub. I still have not forgotten the time I was so deep into meditation and was drifting into the next level when she licked my knee taking me out of it and backing me up several weeks.

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